“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her…” (Ephesians 5:25)(NIV)…Yo Paul you got something easier!!!

I hope you all read last week’s blog by my lovely bride on submission and respect.  Men, sort of makes you poke out your chest and say “Yea WOMAN submit to me”…that is until you think about what Christ did for his bride the church.  Armed with that knowledge it made me take a step back and think “Hmmm, do I really want this job?”  As an immature newly married man I sure liked the idea of “wives submit to your husband.”  I often jokingly reminded Crystal of this passage (about the only one I knew) when we first got married.  Then I started to read past the part for Crystal and focused on what God called me to do.  If you want a great visual of “…love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…”  pop in the DVD The Passion of the Christ by Mel Gibson and let me know if you are man enough for that!!!  Specifically pay special attention to the flogging and ask yourself if helping around the kitchen, listening, sharing, picking up the kids (you fill in the blank) is really that bad.  Honestly I dodged this responsibility for the first 5 years of my marriage and I am still finding my way around Paul’s edict.  Although, time and study has given me a better grasp of what Christ is asking of me as the leader of my home. 

Loving my wife as Christ loved the church is daunting if you really think about ALL that Christ did for his church and for you.  Let us take a look at the rest of the story in Ephesians 5:26-28 (NIV)

²⁶ to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, ²⁷and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. ²⁸ In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

1.      “to make her holy” – Holy means to set apart, to sanctify and as a husband I am to set Crystal apart from everyone else…including Hannah & Zach (our children).  To make her special in the way that no other person is special to me.  What woman does not desire a love that places them at the center of that universe?  I don’t mean to imply that I worship Crystal in an obsessive unhealthy way but in a way that she knows nothing could come between the love we share.  This includes children, parents, (leave & cleave), hobbies and yes even my career.

2.      “present her to himself…” – The word “present” in the original Greek is paristemi which means “to place beside or near…to bring to, bring near (http://www.searchgodsword.org/).  Hampton Keathley IV in his study “Love Your Wife Sacrificially” said that “The purpose of love is the perfecting of the one loved.”  Isn’t that a part of unconditional love?  Isn’t that what Christ is doing to and for us?  Christ served me by hanging on a cross allowing me a place at the banquet table.  I am to present my bide “as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but HOLY (there is that word again) and blameless” because “love is the perfecting of the one loved.”  I see this passage as my duty to build Crystal up, to honor her with my words, to do all I can to help her be the best in Christ she can be.  Placing my wife underneath me (door mat) is not biblical; it is not the word picture I get from Ephesians 5:25-28.  

3.      “…love their wives as their own bodies.” –In Genesis 2:24 our example of the first marriage is to “…become one flesh.”  with our wives.  If we are one flesh than how can a man harm is own body?  Or I guess the better question is why?  When you place your wife beneath you or criticize, ignore, manipulate, dishonor, etc you are doing that unto yourself.  Don’t most of us want the best for ourselves whether that is physically, financially, emotionally, or through hobbies, work, relationships, etc?  We desire what is best for our own “bodies”…well according to God’s plan what we desire for us means we also desire that for our wives.

To quote the great theologian, Uncle Ben in Spider Man "With great power there must come great responsibility” Christ left us His great power, the Holy Spirit, and our great responsibility is to “…love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…”  Submission sure brings on a whole new meaning when you find out that husbands are commanded to be submissive to Christ.  Crystal submits to this broken down sinner of a man (Tim Breaux) and I have to submit to perfection (Christ)…I want to trade!